5 Things Never To Say To New Parents

Despite all your kind intentions as a well-wisher, there are taboo things that we should avoid saying or even hinting to the new parents.  Especially to the first time mom who might still be recovering from childbirth and battling the stress of caring for her newborn.

So as we celebrate the joyous occasion of a baby’s arrival, give a Diaper Cake baby gift hamper to impress your recipient. But don’t nullify the praises you received for choosing an amazing baby gift, with careless comments that might offend the new parents.

Here’s a list of 5 common but careless phrases that innocent well-wishers tend to babble out.

1. “You look tired!”

All new moms look tired!  Especially a first time mom.  Short of being celebrity moms constantly with make up artists and professional hair stylists fussing over them, new moms hardly have time for rest.  If you don’t want to be blacklisted in the minds of your new mom friend or relative, then we highly suggest that you skip this comment.   Sleep deprivation is a norm for all new moms, so a comment like this to a walking female zombie cradling a newborn baby is a NO NO.

2. “When are you having the next one?”

This is one of THE most annoying things you can say to a new mom or dad. I had to deflect this one during my baby’s full month party, coming from a well being senior auntie who had nothing better to say.  Give our poor vagina a break!

This topic of having a second baby right after the first one should be avoided at all costs. Not only is it insensitive, but extremely rude, especially if you do not know if the couple wants another baby, or how difficult it was for them to conceive the first one.

3. “You can finally have a good rest during your maternity leave.”

Are you kidding? Unless we are living in one of these countries that has the best maternity leave in the world, dealing with a newborn baby (and breastfeeding!) full-time for 4 months is not really considered as a well-deserved break.  In fact, having a new baby means you probably won’t have time for yourself for a very long time.

This means the new mommy doesn’t have the luxury to “have a good rest” while taking care of the baby. Unless you think changing diapers full of pee and poop daily, and hushing your baby to stop crying every night is relaxing, don’t say anything.

4.  “He/ She doesn’t look like you!”

Goodness!  Are you trying to imply that we stole the baby from someone else? One of us spent nine exhausting months carrying him around in my tummy.  The least you could do is pretend that he looks like me!

5. “Try to sleep when the baby sleeps.”

This sounds like excellent advice, but almost impossible to follow.  Especially if the new mom is breastfeeding!  Of course we would love to be like the image above, cuddling with our sleeping angel for half a day.  But it’s just not practical.  The time when baby sleeps is when we do the laundry (for the third time today), cook our own food, tidy the house, pay the bills, go to the grocers or make a cup of tea.

So there you have it, avoid saying the above 5 things, and you should be safe from offending a new mother!  Remember, hell hath no fury than a woman (worst for a new mom) scorned!